This day was also a bit of a revelation for me about things. Becky's initial conversation had been at a meal between four of us [with a gay man Paul and a straight lothario, Nick] some days before. Of course, just six weeks off an abandoned suicide attempt and feeling constantly 'a stranger in a strange land', homesick but not keen to return to the house with the landlord's step-daughter and concerned about my future, it is not surprising I was introspective. I suppose also I did not have the usual disasters of my holidays to preoccupy me. It shows that at 21, how naive I was, it was to be another 13 years before I would have sex. I had forgotten this was my attitude at the time, but it explains why I turned down Liz's wish for an encounter later on during this period in Köln. I also realise that quite expecting to have killed myself before I had finished my degree I had made no plans for what to do after university which is one reason why I was so ill-equipped when I graduated and so mucked up any potential career path.
Sunday 14th May 1989
Today I woke promptly and had a day to "do" Augsburg and I did it quite well. It was pouring with rain so first I hung around until the museums opened at 10.00. I first look around the Roman museum, not even mentioned in the Michelin guide. Then I went onto the city gallery. After looking at the Rathaus I went to the Maximillian museum before lunch in MacDonalds. Then I went to the cinema and saw „Zwillinge” ['Twins'] which was easy to follow and was funny. Then, as the weather had got better I went to the Fuggerei and the museum there, then to [Berthold] Brecht's house. I came back to the youth hostel and watched a little television.
I know I have been going on about the impact Becky's revelations had but what she has done is shown me that normal, non-flirty, intelligent people can have pleasant sex within a relationship which has wiped out some of the unpleasantness and sordidness I saw around sex, and to see it just as an extension of embraces and kissing, not something apart.
Also with Becky's conversation on plans for the time after leaving university and even about retiring, has been useful as previously this was a void for me and thus a source of worry. I think this trip down here was good for me and I have seen another nice town.
Tomorrow is both a Monday and a bank holiday. All the sights are closed in München on Mondays anyway but I have found that the 'Mitfahr' offices are open so I can look around them, there may be a lot of demands for lifts to Köln but maybe I can go tomorrow or on Tuesday. There are three offices in München and which I am going to by train. I just hope that there is room in the youth hostel.
I caught the tram and the bus to the Studentenwohnheim hoping to get something on the way but everything was shut. I got there by 19.00 and met up with Becky, Diana, Sara, Breda, Debbie, Karl, Paul and the others. We sat talking for a while and then went to a good Yugoslav restaurant, where we had pola-pola for nine (the German had something different). It consisted of a plate of meat, sausage, vegetables and salad. Then I came back just getting to the youth hostel in time [before the doors were closed for curfew].
Weather: Rainy at first, sunny later.
Rathaus [Town Hall] in Augsburg, West Germany in May 1989
Pedestrianised Street in Augsburg, May 1989
River Running Outside Front Doors close to Berthold Brecht's House, Augsburg, May 1989
Entrance to the Fuggerei Alms 'Village', Augsburg, May 1989
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